hong kong is pretty hot…

I’m in Hong Kong for a week for a bit of a holiday and to hang out with this cool guy who owns the www.megaupload.com and www.megarotic.com websites. Check Alexa.com to see how MegaUpload is doing. MegaRotic is totally awesome by the way, check it out and if I’m wrong, call me a liar.

Anyway, Hong Kong is pretty awesome. It’s so refreshing to be out of Manila and be in a city where people work hard and appear to be mostly competent. The only thing stopping me from moving here is that not a lot of people speak good English, although you can definitely get around ok with hand signals and writing and some broken English.

I landed with some Filipino friends of mine, and the package deal was $400 for return flights and 3 nights hotel stay in Hong Kong. I was expecting some joke hotel for that price, but as it turns out, we are in an awesome hotel on the main street in Kowloon. They still do the insanely annoying thing where if you have “Do Not Disturb” sign on your room, they ring you up to see if you want housekeeping. I will never understand why hotels do this. Nothing tilts me more.

Anyway, the whole city seems to be built a long harbour, which makes for awesome waterfront views. It’s a 1hr ferry ride to Macau, and we’re probably going to go check it out tomorrow.

I’ve been doing a bit of shopping, with lots of good electronic products here pretty cheap without being omg cheap. Just good value.

Explored a bit of the city - the city is pretty wealthy with a nice 3 bdrm apartment in the middle of the city going for around $2 million aud so it’s pretty expensive city to live in.

I saw the most amazing thing I might have ever seen. I’m browsing down the main street in Kowloon and I see a long line at 2pm in the afternoon in front of the Louis Vutton store. I’m like “wtf - what is going on here?” - I stop for a smoke and to investigate.

There is a line about 80 people long with an airport immigration style setup, obviously they’re expecting lines. Security guards at the front of the door wave 2 patient people in when 2 leave. I’m fascinated - I can’t turn away. I watch for about 15 min and decide to try my luck at getting into the store. I walk up to the doors of the store and try to enter. The security guard motions to the back of the line. I pull out a large wad of US dollars, and he looks at me like I’m stupid and motions to the back of the line. WTF? I have a wad of cash trying to enter a store that sells expensive products and security is telling me I need to wait my turn in the line. How f awesome is that? I want shares in Louis Vutton - that’s just ridiculous.

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omg so tilted…

So I land back in Manila to find all my HSBC accounts are locked. I call them up and I’m told my accounts have all been closed for good - no one is able to tell me why. I head down to the branch for my money and for some explanations. They tell me they have closed my accounts for “administrative reasons”. I demand to know more. They repeat themselves over and over. I sit down in an office and tell them I won’t leave until I’m given the exact reason why my accounts have all been closed for good. After an hour or so, a senior manager comes in and skirts around the topic, but finally lets it slip that the accounts are being closed due to money-laundering concerns. What a joke. I have no money to launder. In Manila, if someone wires you 5k, I guess that means you’re laundering money.

Thankfully, my balances weren’t “lost in the system”, which I’m told can happen pretty easily here, and its not hard to believe. I take my cash and head to Citibank. Citibank tell me they can’t help me, say I need an ACR (Alien Certificate of Registration) to open an account in the Philippines. You can only get an ACR if you have a job or are “investing” in the Philippines. I don’t qualify.

After five more banks telling me the same thing, I head home in disgust, having wasted about 4 hours of my day on mega-tilt, walking around Manila with enough money to easily get me killed.

The banking rules here are retarded. I am a foreigner staying here legally that spends a fortune and will continue to spend a fortune, but they don’t want to let me bank so they are forcing me out. Smart move retards. And I’ve been wondering why there are so few foreigners here. I’ve spent/lost over $100,000 in 3 months here and will probably lose/spend another 100k in the next whatever…I guess they want me to burn that money somewhere else.

I now have a bit of a dilemma - I have a pretty high-end industrial safe which I bolted into the cupboard but I’m 99% sure my maid is taking little lottery shots at the combination. Her chances aren’t great, its a 5-digit pin, so she’s got 100,000 numbers to work though, but I love it that she’s got a bit of gamble in her. Now that no banks in this city will take my business, her Powerball just hit the Mega Jackpot.

When I hired her, I thought I’d better get a safe so as not to give her temptation with money lying all over the place. For the first month or so, it used to baffle me how when I put in the code, sometimes it wouldn’t open. I’d have to press “Clear” and type the code in again. I called up the manufacturer, and they said the only thing that could be causing this is if someone is putting in the incorrect code. The customer support guy says, “Do you have a maid?” Ding.

I decided to try a little test. On days my maid comes in, the code almost never works first time I try. On days she doesn’t come in, or if I’m awake the whole time she’s here, the code works first time every time.

I don’t blame her for having a shot, and whilst I wouldn’t even be all that angry at her if she got lucky, hit the combo, and took it all, I really can’t afford to lose that money. And I can’t fire her without proof as she does really good work, even if she calls in sick every 2nd day and hits me up for loans every week. Maybe she’s cleaning the safe each day and accidentally hitting the keys. Unlikely, but perhaps possible.

I really don’t know what to do. I bought a little camera so I’m gonna start filming the safe. Hate that it’s come to this - stupid government retarded rules. 70% of the population lives on under $2 a day in the Philippines - why not make it impossible for foreigners who spend a lot to stay?

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Ugly hands vol. 2….

Looking through a few hands from last week, and some are just disgusting. I really play like shit when downswinging….

—–

I just played this hand about half an hour ago and it was just disgusting. I think I played 3 streets terribly against a 40/15 fish. PT didn’t pick it up, so I’ll just write it.

10/20 Blind battle, running pretty bad against this fish when he minraises into my BB. I 3-bet pot with QQ. He calls.

Flop is K-T-4 rainbow. He checks, I check behind. I should c-bet here always I think.

Turn is Jd, bringing a flush draw. He checks, I bet 80%, he calls. I hate this bet so much. As soon as I made the bet, I expected a big c/r, and I’d have to dump my hand. His range and the board are in bed together.

River is 9d, bringing the possible flush. I’m so relieved that he didn’t c/r me on turn, and that I’ve hit my straight, I quickly put him in (pot sized bet) on river. He insta-calls with AQdd.

I don’t think I thought about this hand on any street. Just ugly. I’m completely out of sorts lately, I think if I flipped coins for options on every street, I’d run better.

—–

$10/$20 Blinds No Limit Hold’em
Table “Disgusting c-bet” (Real Money)
Seat 2 is the button
Total number of players : 6
Seat 10: Hijack ( $338 )
Seat 2: Cutoff ( $2132 )
Seat 4: Hero Button ( $1963 )
Seat 6: SB ( $2000 )
Seat 8: BB ( $1254.08 )
Seat 9: UTG ( $753.5 )
SB posts [$10].
BB posts [$20].
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to Hero [ 9c 10c ]
UTG calls [$20].
Hijack folds.
Cuttoff raises [$90].
Hero raises [$317].
SB folds.
BB folds.
UTG folds.
Cutoff calls [$237].
** Dealing Flop ** [ Qs, 4d, 8c ]
Cutoff checks.
Hero bets [$421].
Cutoff raises [$1805].
Hero folds.
** Summary **
Cutoff collected [$2916].

This c-bet was just terrible. He’s pushing here a large % of the time. I have gutshot and r/r flush draws and should have taken the free card.

Just frustration at a 18/13 nit. Yuk.

—–

Texas Hold’em $5-$10 NL (real money)
Table “Paying Off Yet Again”

Seat 5: BB ($1,257.50 in chips)
Seat 8: Hero UTG [ 8S,9S ] ($1,066.00 in chips)
Seat 9: Button ($210.00 in chips)
Seat 10: SB ($447.50 in chips)
ANTES/BLINDS
SB posts ($5), BB posts ($10).

PRE-FLOP
Hero bets $35, Button folds, SB folds, BB calls $25.

FLOP [board cards 9H,4C,7H ]
BB checks, Hero bets $54, BB calls $54.

TURN [board cards 9H,4C,7H,8D ]
BB checks, Hero bets $142, BB bets $1,168.50 and is all-in, Hero calls $835 and is all-in.

RIVER [board cards 9H,4C,7H,8D,AC ]

SHOWDOWN
BB shows [ 5H,6H ]
Hero shows [ 8S,9S ]
BB wins $2,326.50.

This was a tricky one. BB is 29/11 and fairly tricky. I can’t put him on straight after flop action obviously unless he had a combo draw, which I thought he’d c/r with on the flop. Set is most obvious hand that beats me, but I thought he’d c/r with that on flop also, and I didn’t think he’d push like that with a set on the turn. Nothing really made sense to me, so I called. I dunno about this hand, it seems that every time I call one of these sick overbets, I’m beat. I rarely see people over-betting bluffs these days, its almost always the goods. Probably should have folded.

—–

$5/$10 Blinds No Limit Hold’em
Table “Sandwiched Yuk” (Real Money)
Seat 9 is the button
Total number of players : 6
Seat 10: SB ( $159.49 )
Seat 2: BB1 ( $1177.5 )
Seat 4: Hero UTG ( $1868.4 )
Seat 5: Hijack ( $520.25 )
Seat 6: Cutoff ( $1323 )
Seat 9: Button ( $1657.56 )
SB posts [$5].
BB posts [$10].
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to Hero [ Qd Jd ]
Hero raises [$35].
Hijack folds.
Cutoff folds.
Button calls [$35].
SB folds.
BB calls [$25].
** Dealing Flop ** [ Qc, 8c, 6c ]
BB checks.
Hero bets [$78].
Button raises [$166].
BB calls [$166].
Hero calls [$88].
** Dealing Turn ** [ 10h ]
BB checks.
Hero checks.
Button checks.
** Dealing River ** [ 2h ]
BB checks.
Hero checks.
Button bets [$230].
BB calls [$230].
Hero calls [$230].
** Summary **
Button shows [ 7s Ks ].
BB shows [ 6h 6d ].
Hero mucks.
BB collected [$1294].

Button is 45/19 - total maniac fish. Has been showing down random air hands at showdown over and over again.

BB is 42/23 and passive.

On the flop, I’m miles ahead of button’s raising range, and I figure BB is drawing. I should have just let it go on flop - I’m not going anywhere with this hand. Was just tired of button raising me with air every hand and hitting random overcard 3-outers when I called him down.

On river, I still figured I’m ahead of button’s range, but once BB calls, I have to dump it. I was thinking he knew button was crazy also, and was calling him light after missing his draw but hitting a piece.

Just an ugly hand.

————

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a must-see movie…

I am quite the movie buff, and often take my time to instruct my poor unfortunate friend Franco about the quality or lack thereof of certain films. Franco is a dear boy with many fine qualities, however it became clear very early in the piece that he has almost no clue about movies or what makes movies great. He is a movie fish. Despite being exposed to a great deal of fine education, dear Franco listed Spiderman 2 on his Top Ten list.

What makes my chats with Franco entertaining is that he disagrees strongly with my obviously correct assessment of his critiquing ability in regards to movies. In his braver moments, he even goes so far as to imply it is I that has no idea what I’m talking about. LOLLER. What a riot. It’s always more fun to argue with someone who disagrees with you strongly, and is not a total moron like the jokers on PokerNetwork. I quite enjoy a good argument, and like to argue with people who aren’t retards, but usually all the smart people agree with me, which is obviously very frustrating.

However, even a Philistine such as Franco would agree that “All About Eve” is a must-see movie.

As I have zero life and completely fear online poker at the moment, I am working my way through some top 100 ‘classic’ lists. I’ve seen some good movies (Hitchcock’s are surprisingly entertaining), and some bad ones (”Annie Hall” - Woody Allen is on Strike 2 after his disappointing “Match Point”, which I didn’t enjoy very much, partly because I am not Scarlett Johansson-crazed like the rest of the world, but mostly because I just wasn’t that intrigued by the dialogue or premise).

It’s somewhat ironic that the premise of both “All About Eve” and “Match Point” are very similar. Both movies deal with a crafty character mixing with the more fortunate, attempting to improve their station in life. Yet All About Eve is adorable and glorious, whilst Match Point was a clear also-ran.

But this post is supposed to be all about All About Eve. After much discussion within myself (these matters are not trivial and must not be arrived at lightly), I have decided to place All About Eve 3rd on my all-time favourite list, behind A Few Good Men and Garden State and ahead of Full Metal Jacket and Amistad.

Before watching it, I had read some glowing reviews of All About Eve, but these are the same people who think Citizen Kane was the greatest movie of all-time. For the record, I thought Citizen Kane was ok, but I don’t think it deserves the plaudits it has received. As I was very bored, and had watched everything else, I decided to throw caution to the wind, clear my busy schedule and watch All About Eve. A few minutes into the movie, I was beginning to wonder if the Citizen Kane jokers had pulled another fast one. But then the magic began.

All About Eve is a pure delight. A complete classic, with star performances and brilliant, witty repertoire between the characters almost from start to finish. Bette Davis is sublime as Margo Channing, the neurotic but stubborn star facing both a mid-life crisis and a young fan who appears to adore her initially, but who shows her true colours in time. I really don’t know how to describe this movie adequately, but perhaps the highest accolade I can give it would be to argue that, if this movie were a novel, it would rank right alongside The Great Gatsby. Fitzgerald would be proud to have written it.

The star performances come from the three female leads (Bette Davis was nominated for an Oscar but didn’t win, which was a crime) and George Sanders, who plays the cynical and manipulative theatre critic Addison DeWitt (who did win an Oscar for this role). I do love to quote lines from movies and whatnot, but I wouldn’t know where to start with this movie. The whole movie is full of witty one-liners and comebacks, its just glorious. When Margo gets neurotic, jealous and angry, she is just superb with her vicious, witty sarcasm.

A young lady arrives half-way through the movie in a cameo role at a party and completely steals every scene she is in. I immediately fell in love with her, having no idea who she was. Upon research, I discovered the name of the young actress, you may have heard of her - Marilyn Monroe. I never really understood the obsession with Marilyn Monroe until just now. She is just adorable. In partnership with DeWitt, she delivers my favourite exchange of the movie:

[a butler passes by]
Miss Claudia Caswell: Oh, waiter!
Addison DeWitt: That is not a waiter, my dear, that is a butler.
Miss Claudia Caswell: Well, I can’t yell “Oh butler!” can I? Maybe somebody’s name is Butler.
Addison DeWitt: You have a point. An idiotic one, but a point.

And one more from DeWitt, after he finally makes his dramatic play for Eve at the end of the film, revealing his hole cards:

“Is it possible, is it even conceivable, that you’ve confused me with that gang of backward children you play tricks on? I’m Addison DeWitt. I’m nobody’s fool, least of all yours.

That I should want you at all suddenly strikes me as the height of improbability… you’re an improbable person, Eve, but so am I. We have that in common. Also a contempt for humanity, an inability to love or be loved, insatiable ambition - and talent. We deserve each other.”

——

They just don’t make movies like they used to - I’m going to watch it again….

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the wire….

My new favourite TV show - not quite as slick as The Shield, but very, very close….

——

Fucken white boys I love em, I fucken love em.

Yeah?

Dumb as a box of rocks.

Who?

White boys, talking about the brain deads in my Cane Street case. I call em up, I tell em I wanna buy some drugs. You know what he says? Says Ok, I sell you the drugs, how much drugs do you want? I swear to God Keema, they don’t code it, they don’t ask for a meeting, nothing. And then when you make the deal, there’s no running, no bullshit. It’s the guy himself walking up to you in the parking lot saying, I’ve brought the drugs, did you bring the money? I’m not kidding, have much respect for black people after working with these idiots for two weeks. Seriously, if white boys wanna sell drugs in Baltimore, we have to make different rules for it, like even it out for em.

Affirmative action?

Leave no white man behind.

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and the hits just keep on coming…

When running bad, I like to remain indoors for fear of almost certain bad luck should I leave the safety of my room. This generally limits me only to online pain, but if I don’t play online and don’t leave the room, I can generally eliminate beats altogether.

But I’m running so bad, the beats have found a way to hit me, even when I stay indoors. I am sleeping peacefully when the rude ringing of the phone awakens me, brutally cutting short my dreams of Natalie Portman and avocadoes. I have developed a little technique I do in my sleep where I pick up my phone and answer, and if the call is not important, I apparently have this ability to hang up and remain asleep without ever actually waking up or remembering the conversation. I am assured of this fact by numerous sources. However, today the caller intrigued me - it was my banking manager calling to ask me about $10,000 charged to my Visa card overnight. I was wide awake pretty quickly, wondering if I’d forgotten some trip to the Rhino.

It turns out the wonderful staff at Rio Hotel have attempted to charge $10,000 to my Visa in a 24-hour period. No. 10 by Tanqueray is not cheap, but either my drinking problem is much worse than I thought, or I’m being heavily overcharged. More importantly, hotels only hold credit cards for security purposes, with all bills settled when you check out, so no charges were possible.

Normally, I would enjoy this opportunity to box the ears of the staff responsible, but with sleep deprivation, I promised myself I would remain cordial and polite until the matter was resolved, which would allow me to get back to sleep as quickly as possible. This lasted for about 3 minutes, when I couldn’t deal with the stupidity of the front desk manager any longer. She didn’t know the difference between authorising a credit card and actually charging it, and she’s a hotel manager. We went back and forth for some time with her assuring me I was merely imagining the entire phone call and that no charges had been made to my card.

Now, had I been thinking clearly, being a man of not inconsiderable ability to think clearly in a crisis, I would have realised that the only explanation for her having her job with her limited intellect would be that she is ungodly smoking hot. Nothing else could possibly explain how someone this stupid has a management position. Had I been able to think clearly instead of fantasising about sleep, I could have been really baller and cool and hooked up a James Alexander Cox Zero tuning effort on her. Unfortunately, I am a moron and doomed to never going on a date again. Instead, I roundly berated her, and demanded to speak to her supervisor, advising her to go draw with some crayons whilst I took care of business.

I don’t know if her male supervisor (general manager I think) is hot or not, or whether he slept his way to the top, but its definitely possible because he also turned out to be a Grade A moron. He also insinuated I imagined the entire thing, implying he had better things to do with his time. I had to resort to getting my bank manager in Australia to call him, which she did immediately.

He rang back quickly to apologise and promised to look into the whole affair, saying he had never come across anything like this before. It’s now 8pm and he never called back.

So I have $10,000 visa charges floating in intraweb hyperspace somewhere, I missed out on a chance to Zero-tune an almost certainly stunning hot manager, and I’ve had little to no sleep. I don’t want to tempt fate by wondering if I could possibly run worse, but it does beg the question….

(Update 16/07/07 - So after leaving about 10 unanswered messages on manager’s answering machine, receiving only one reply over 4 days or so in which he promised to continue with the investigation, I ring my bank in Australia to ask what the deal is. The deal is pure tilt from my normally unflappable bank manager. She was furious. She said, “This guy has to be either attempting some kind of fraud or completely incompetent. He continually claims his system shows no sign of the $10,000 in charges. Yet the charges are showing up as Rio Hotel and the money is withdrawn from your account. He won’t return my calls so I’m putting in fraud charges with VISA against that hotel and returning all funds to your account.”

Freaking Rio morons.)

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